Last night a broke slightly from the cleanse. Went out for Indian food with friends. Had a spinach paneer with some cheese and vegetable biryani. One onion bajhi. But overall, compared to what I would have normally eaten--butter chicken, fried stuff, big beer--- it felt good to go out and not overeat. At the end of the meal I really had a strong sense of satiety, not just foodwise, but psychologically. It feels good to see the possibility of be liberated from all these compulsive food choices, motivated to eat by authentic, not emotional hunger.
Had some insomnia last night because I'm still having problems with the back pain. I'm not sure if this is because I haven't been running as much, or something to do with the cleanse. It could also be this large uterine fibroid I recently discovered. It's part of the reason I'm keeping up with the cleanse. I wonder if bad habits have built up to grow this fibroid.
I know I've always stored a lot of tension in my back. It may be that now my body is going in to deal with that.
Here's hoping it will pass. While I feel these aches and pain, I'm also feeling a growing energy. It's as though this energy now allows me to deal with the foundation parts that have always been too weak.
Time to rebuild.
