Last few days, and even right now, have been high stress. Court, financial crisis, transitional time. It's all scary stuff.
But there is something deeper I think that I have to deal with. An undermining energy. A fundamental lack of compassion for myself. I have not been taking the actions needed to protect myself from this situation. I have not been acting responsibly.
There's a part of me that wants to blame this on ZZ. That wants to say, look: ZZ has not solved all your problems. You have still made some bad decisions. But that's not ZZs fault. I abandonned that. It didn't abandon me.
It's T.V.. Internet surfing. Internet buying that have been leading me around like a lost dog looking for my owner. And I have been passively allowing that to happen.
Yeah, I need to sit down and make realistic getting money plans right now.
But on the plus side, at least I don't need a lot of money.
