So this it. I've reached the six month goal that I set. And if I've noticed one major change recently it's that I've become more goal oriented. Achieving goals does that to you.
I've always been pretty suspicious of goal directed living. It smells to me of meritocracy. And I always worry that when one gets too focussed on goals one can so easily forget to take the time to just be.
At the same time there is an undeniable energy that comes from a life of action. It's a more manic energy. Or at least it feels like that to me today. So it's important to remember to take the time to breathe and make sure ones actions are coming from a relaxed intuitive place.
The great gift that this six months has given me, I think, it that it has helped me develop the habit of bookending my days with nurturing relaxed time. Standing in the morning. Early, quiet sleeptime in the evening. I want to be more active, but I don't want the habits of action to lead me into debilitating stress.
It's good to focus on the next small action, on the present moment. It's good to be organized in one's thinking and one's life. It's good, however, and really important to be able to take the time to feel the big picture.
I had a moment the other day: "Pre dawn purple sky. Birds up. What's going to happen with my life. Oh right, this is my life."
