Mingyur Rinpoche says that the essence of generosity is letting go. We tend to think of it as giving, but to give that which a bodhisattva most deeply wants to give, enlightenment, we have to let go of all that muddies this joyful wisdom that is our birthright.
Anger, resentment, envy, I continue to struggle with these everyday, as do most people living in the world. The best way to let them go is to be with them until they dissolve, but this is hard work, and that is where the generosity comes in.
I need to let go of the cravings that burn up the time I could be putting into letting my anger, resentment and envy go. So this week I devote time to letting go. Letting go of bad food. Letting go of bad habits. Letting go of lethargy and binge watching. Letting go of fatigue and poor health.
Later:
2 hrs of meditation later.
I started a meditation on anger, but I realized later that really the emotion I need to let go of if I'm going to be generous is hatred. Similar, but different. Anger is the emotion that arises, hatred is that emotion applied to an object, now seen as the source of the anger.
Hatred is what makes the anger seem solid and material. So to become more generous, I'm going to take some time today, and this week to recognize and release the hating habit.
Re-reading some of my past posts on hatred, I found some forgotten insight:
First, this one on the recursive power of hatred. If you apply just the right amount of hatred to hatred, it becomes like a de-iterating loop, ceasing at the point of equanimity.
And just before that, a night when I started to move away from self-hatred. Clearly, I've been down this path before, and there's a wonderful place at the end of it, that I can find my way back to.
