Today I'm doing a self-directed retreat.
My life is in a state of transition as I work more, succeed more, and take on more responsibility. The old patterns of fear and reactivity emerge. I remember my professional family, chaotic, stressed, feeling enslaved to so many forces. Samsara. The ordinary whole catastrophe.
Sometimes when I head into a retreat, I have a hope that somehow I can make this all go away. But a kinder, more viable plan is to simply see the pattern and look at where I have a tendency to let things spin out of control.
It's okay to be anxious and feel overwhelmed. But it's also okay to be calm, lucid, focused and resilient.
This week as I prepare for my half marathon, I've been working on resting in the relaxation that emerges from a fit and vital body. Resting in that relaxation creates a positive loop of relaxation.
The same thing happens in loving kindness, compassion, joy and equanimity. The more habitual these qualities become the more they grow. For many years I have wrestled with their shadows, attachment, over excitement, pity, passivity. But I feel less desperate and greedy for the fruits of meditation these days. I am deeply grateful for the insights and perceptions that have evolved as a result of this practice. And I am excited in a very real way for them to take root.
Sunday, September 18, 2016
Sunday, September 4, 2016
Focus
This week I've been working on focussing my eyes. Or rather resting my eyes, and thus my mind while |I meditate, run, live.
It's so easy to forget this simple, but powerful practice. The mind wanders around as if in a dream, and all we need to do bring is back is simply rest our eyes on a still object: a tree in the distance, a favourie coffee cup, an orange, our hands.
Resting my eyes is the first step, then sensing my body and the space around it, then resting in the outbreath, and finally feeling the inevitable relaxation and flow of pleasant neurotransmitters. Such a simple and powerful algorithm.
Resting the yes on a single point creates focus. This grounds the imagination, and sooner than we realize, we can start dreaming the dream we want to dream and stop being caught in the random dream generator.
It's so easy to forget this simple, but powerful practice. The mind wanders around as if in a dream, and all we need to do bring is back is simply rest our eyes on a still object: a tree in the distance, a favourie coffee cup, an orange, our hands.
Resting my eyes is the first step, then sensing my body and the space around it, then resting in the outbreath, and finally feeling the inevitable relaxation and flow of pleasant neurotransmitters. Such a simple and powerful algorithm.
Resting the yes on a single point creates focus. This grounds the imagination, and sooner than we realize, we can start dreaming the dream we want to dream and stop being caught in the random dream generator.
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