Life is a precious gift. Really, every day we should be waking up as though we won the lottery, when we consider the tremendous odds of being born at all. And to add to this gift, the fortune to be aware of life's full potential. And to be able to activate that potential.
How is it that I spend so much more time feeling overwhelmed by life's challenges than I am overwhelmed by its plenty? Because my beliefs limit me.
Whatever I know at an abstract level, I am still in the habit of believing in this singular, solid self, this collection of sad and angry memories, this financially and still emotionally struggling self. I still find myself locked in to angry obsessive loops of energy.
But there's an emerging energy in recent months, the same, yet different from that pure energy I've felt in my chi kung practice. It's a free flowing almost fractal like, snakey, wavey energy that is in my gut. The difference is subtle, but important. It's the ease with which I can now activate it. I rest my bare attention on it, recognize it as both precious and impermanent and then I just watch it go.
In time it rises up. Up through my heart, my mouth and eventually out the top of my head.
This is the result of my lent decision to sleep earlier, rise earlier, listen only to Tergar material to get to sleep.
This is my Easter gift to myself.
